


Vulcan's Don't Kiss (Except They Do)

by Lost_And_Insane



Series: Spirk One-Shots [2]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Kirk loves Spock, Kissing, M/M, Surprise Kissing, Vulcan Kisses, and Bones knows it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 18:02:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13595439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lost_And_Insane/pseuds/Lost_And_Insane
Summary: “So?” Bones asked, beginning to get impatient. He already had to suffer by being in Spock’s presence multiple times a day, and now he’d have to listen to Kirk’s lovesick ramblings about the hobgoblin as well?“So, I think Spock doesn’t know how to kiss,” Kirk said, the grin still on his face. McCoy sighed again and was really considering just blatantly leaving Kirk to sit by himself.





	Vulcan's Don't Kiss (Except They Do)

The replicated food in front of Kirk was starting to get cold, the Starfleet captain just pushing it around with his fork while staring straight ahead. His head was resting in the palm of his hand, his blue eyes glazed over as he was buried deep in thought, and McCoy had to resist the urge to nudge his arm like he used to do when his friend would doze off during classes. They weren’t students anymore, Bones reminded himself, and making his _captain_ face-plant the table might not be the best idea.

“Are you actually going to eat something or are you just here to stare at the wall?” The doctor settled on just talking.

Kirk seemed to startle back to reality, accidentally launching a bit of his food across the table. The captain smiled cheekily when it landed on McCoy’s uniform.

“Sorry,” Kirk chuckled. “I was thinking.”

Of course, Kirk could just eat his dinner in his private quarters, but he actually enjoyed eating in the crew lounge like everyone else. It was a part of his daily routine that he always looked forward to. As captain of the Enterprise, he found it important to maintain a good bond with all of his crew members; it was something he’d learned from captain Pike and he was planning on following the advice until he no longer needed it.

McCoy scoffed and started wiping at his uniform, willing the new-formed stain to go off. Now he’d have to walk all the way back to his personal quarters to get a new shirt. “What could you possibly prioritize over food?”

Now it was Kirk’s time to scoff, shaking his head but not trying to defend himself against the comment. He looked down at his food, giving it a final push with his fork before shoving it away from him completely and giving Bones his full attention; it was as if he’d only just realized his friend was sitting there.

“You know,” he said casually, “I’ve been thinking.”

“I’ve noticed,” Bones muttered, rolling his eyes. Kirk decided to ignore the comment.

“It’s about Spock,” he said, going back to leaning his head on his hand. 

McCoy bit his tongue. He had known Kirk long enough to know what he looked like when he was in love. His eyes got this certain glimmer to them, and his smile seemed more genuine when he talked about someone he loved; Kirk would rather die than admit it, but he was quite a typical teenager when it came to crushes. Bones wasn’t sure if Kirk was aware of it, but the captain had been drooling over Spock from the moment they’d met.

“You know how he was in a relationship with Uhura, right?” Kirk asked. A hint of jealousy was evident on his face, not _quite_ as hidden as the captain would’ve liked.

“Yes,” McCoy said carefully. “What about it?”

Kirk looked around the crew lounge for a few seconds, searching for either Spock or Uhura. He found the latter sitting in the very corner with a few friends (she gave Kirk a polite smile when she noticed him looking), but Spock was nowhere to be seen. After the two had broken up for unknown reasons, they remained close friends, so Kirk was surprised that the Vulcan wasn’t sitting with Uhura at the moment. Perhaps he was still busy with his research.

“Have you ever seen them kiss?” Kirk eventually asked, leaning over the table so Bones could hear his whisper. “Like, _actually_ kiss?”

“What?” Bones exclaimed loudly, and Kirk shushed him immediately, turning to see whether Uhura had heard them.

The doctor let out a huge sigh. “Why are you thinking about this?”

“No, hear me out. Have you ever seen them kiss? Because _I_ haven’t.”

“Uhura has kissed Spock multiple times, what are you on about?” Bones muttered, but Kirk shook his head.

“Only on the cheek,” he said, smiling like he’d just won an important argument. 

See? A typical teenager.

“So?” Bones asked, beginning to get impatient. He already had to suffer by being in Spock’s presence multiple times a day, and now he’d have to listen to Kirk’s lovesick ramblings about the hobgoblin as well?

“ _So,_ I think Spock doesn’t know how to kiss,” Kirk said, the grin still on his face. McCoy sighed again and was really considering just blatantly leaving Kirk to sit by himself.

McCoy facepalmed. “Why are we talking about this?”

“Vulcans kiss using their hands,” Kirk continued like he hadn’t noticed McCoy’s annoyance. “And since they’re all about logic, it wouldn’t make sense for them to try our way of kissing. I mean, it makes sense, doesn’t it? Why would he ever kiss someone in the Terran way?”

Suddenly, McCoy seemed to have gotten more interested in the topic, the doctor smiling ever so subtly.

“Maybe you’re right,” he said. “So, what’s your point again?”

Kirk scoffed. “Have you been listening to me at all? Spock doesn’t know how to kiss.”

McCoy’s smile grew bigger, and Kirk suddenly realized his eyes weren’t focused on him anymore. The captain muttered a couple of swearwords, all of them aimed at Bones, and then slowly turned around.

As expected, Spock was standing right behind Kirk, a single eyebrow raised so high it almost disappeared behind his bangs. Kirk turned a deep shade of red and almost fell off his chair in shock.

“S-Spock!” he stuttered, and McCoy held back laughter. “I d-didn’t know you were- I mean, I didn’t mean-“

Kirk was shut up when Spock abruptly grabbed Kirk’s chin and lifted his head, planting his lips on Kirk’s own. It took Kirk a solid couple of seconds to get past his shock, but once he had, he kissed back harshly, raising his hand to weave his fingers through Spock’s hair. Bones pretended to be very interested in his – now cold – food, only looking up when Spock pulled back from the kiss.

Kirk had turned an even deeper shade of red, and Bones couldn’t help but laugh at his friend’s stunned expression.

Spock didn’t seem the slightest bit flustered. He calmly sat down in the chair next to Kirk, grabbing his PADD and casually sliding it on the table in front of the captain.

“Captain, I need your signature for my report on the anomaly that we discovered near Kalesta System,” he said, his voice only just audible over Bones’ continuous laughter.

Kirk was still busy gaping at his first officer, and Spock waited patiently for him to catch up with the situation.

“R-Right, yeah, of course,” he eventually said. When he looked down at the PADD, Bones – who had finally stopped laughing at his best friend’s embarrassment – noticed Spock smile ever so slightly. When Kirk looked back up, though, the smile had disappeared completely.

“Thank you.” Spock grabbed his PADD again and stood up, giving his friends a small nod before turning and walking away, with the captain staring at him until he’d disappeared around the corner. While Kirk slowly turned back around, McCoy and Uhura quickly shared a thumbs up. 

Placing his head in the palm of his hand, the captain stared straight ahead of him, his eyes glazed over and a big, goofy smile on his face.

_A typical teenager._


End file.
